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Grooming the Groom

3 July 2007 No Comment

Face It
Let’s start where everybody is going to be looking at first. The Face. The face is the first thing everybody is going to notice when you’re walking down that aisle, not to mention frozen in time on endless numbers of wedding photos. They will see the tears (joy or sorrow), the hair, the teeth, eyes, everything. You’ll need to make sure that everything is in top shape before you walk out that door.

The lost art of shaving:
Hopefully we don’t have to tell you to shave before your wedding. If a goatee, mustache, or beard is something you could never part with, then at least get a trim. Unless you are completely confident in your abilities: it’s time to visit a barber. Find a barber that can trim a beard or give you a shave.

If you’re the kind of guy who doesn’t like facial hair on your Wedding Day, it would be a nice idea to get a shave from a barber. This lost “art” is something most guys can’t appreciate nowadays. Your Wedding is the perfect excuse to revive this dying art. At least you will prevent the accidental shaving cut! Back in the day, men would go in for a hair cut, and then stay in their seats for a shave and occasionally a tooth pulling.

The barber will first prep your skin with a hot (we repeat: HOT) towel and let it sit on your face for a while. This allows your skin pores to open and it softens your facial hair. This all makes for a smoother and closer shave. Next comes the shaving cream. Typically the shaving cream is warm. The barber will then take a sharpened straight razor, and give you the best shave you’ve ever had. If you think your handy Mach 3 is good, wait until you experience a barber style shave. Nothing shaves closer than a straight edge. Your skin should feel like a baby’s bottom after their done. Your future wife will definitely notice the difference, and so will you.

Hair:
Now is the time to ditch the barber who gives the same haircut to everybody that walks through his store. Yeah it only cost 5 bucks, but this is the most important day of your life. You’ll need to do a little better then that. Look into some “hair salons” that cater to men, as well as women. A lot of high-end salons understand that not everybody’s got the same shaped head and features. They can tailor the haircut (or style) to match your personality, hair texture, and facial features.
If you don’t know of any hair salons in your area, ask for a reference. Talk to your friend’s girlfriends, neighbor’s or high-powered boss. If the sight of their hair doesn’t repulse you, chances are they know of a good salon. Scoping out the Internet is another way to find local resources in your area. Several months in advance check out a few different places. Do a few trials before the wedding to make sure you like the haircut.
Make an appointment for one week before your wedding for the real “due” day. If you have very short hair, you may choose to have it cut one or two days before your wedding.

After you’re done with the cut; the stylist will probably take some concoction and style your hair. If you like what they did, ask them how they did it. Find out what they used in your hair, and buy it on the spot. If you don’t think you can replicate it, the stylist should be more then happy to style it for you again before the ceremony. It might be nice to give them a few bucks too! After you’ve got your hair all sassed up, look in the mirror and grin. You deserve it you handsome devil!

Nail it down
Look at your fingers. Look carefully. How long are your nails? Do you see pieces of donut inside your fingernails? Would your nails set off store alarms? Does it look like a pair of hungry hyenas gnawed on them all night? It may be time to visit the local nail salon and have a manicure.
Yes, we know. It makes you look like a Nancy Boy. And the truth is, it probably will. But there is a light (a rather dim light) at the end of this tunnel. When your wife or everybody at the whole frickin wedding holds your hands, they will not be repulsed, and they certainly won’t pick up any coodies. Somebody once said that,”God is in the details”. Let those words speak for themselves. In terms of your body, this is like icing on the cake. It makes everything look a hell of a lot better. It shows everybody that you’re a man of class, and you enjoy the finer things in life…like hygiene for example. Plus, the “hand in hand” pictures will live for forever!

Say Cheese
Your wedding day will probably be the one day where you’ll be smiling until it hurts! Whether the smiles are fake or real, there will probably be dozens of cameras taking your picture. If you don’t want your close-ups to look like they were taken in England, we suggest you get your teeth whitened. Your pictures will be in your family (and your children’s family) forever. Your fiancé will probably want you two to look your very best. Nobody wants to see teeth that are brown and crusty. Make this an activity that you and your woman can both do together.

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